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A Wolf in Church

This is an excerpt from the memoir I'm writing, about growing up in Alaska, Europe and California in the 70's and 80's. The book walks the fractal lines between imagination and madness, religion and reality. In a time and place devoid of child psychologists but rich in a bond with the wilderness, a young girl copes with trauma by invoking a world populated with strange creatures. In this chapter, some of the creatures begin entering everyday reality, and transforming it. 

I was to sing with the church choir for every special occasion until I graduated high school. Good Friday was the worst—the most mournful, guilt-ridden day of the year. Every year I dreaded it more, for I had killed Christ Jesus. Never mind that He’d died willingly, leapt to the beams of the cross that tortured him; it was because I, the worst of the worst among sinners, had put him there. Somehow, God had known this even before the creation of the world. He’d looked down through time and seen that I woul…

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